How I, Taylor, as a 21-year-old am keeping sane during this time.
I am young. I was at the height of freedom when it was so quickly taken away from me. I had goals and measures in place for my future. For 3 years, I have worked hard so that I could play even harder. Slowly but surely, I climbed the ladder of becoming fully independent. This is not to say life was easy or blissful.
Why did it have to take a pandemic to force me into sitting with my emotions? Why did it take a lockdown to force me into taking care of my body, of my soul? For so long Mother Nature has had to adapt to us. But now - now it’s time for us to adapt to Mother Nature.
We are stuck inside. We are unable to do things like go for a walk, go out to eat and go to church - all things that were our rights which are things we now crave. Why wouldn’t we use this once in a lifetime chance to heal. Heal our bodies. Heal broken relationships. Heal bad habits. Because I can tell you, with absolute certainty, that Mother Nature is healing, so why not do it together?
I am a planner. I don’t like surprises. Lockdown was the biggest surprise, so can you blame me for liking it? I plan everything I eat in a day, to the time, to the quantity and to the calorie. I know what I’m doing the coming weekend. I know the exact time and with whom I’ll be spending it with. I plan meetings for work. I plan my exercise schedule. I’ve even tried planning my love life. I’ve put all my thoughts and efforts into my future that I’ve actually lost time.
Not only did I lose time, but amongst it all I lost myself too.
I have lost time being a planner. Not only did I lose time, but amongst it all I lost myself too. I didn’t ask to be here. I didn’t ask for the experiences I’ve been so lucky to endure. Yet, I’m trying to plan it all when it was never my duty to from the beginning.
A pandemic was never part of my plan. Being stuck inside was never part of my plan. You can image what I’m going through. It’s like being a perfectionist and the vase of flowers aren’t in the dead centre of the table. The plate is on top of the bowl. Eating soup with a fork.
It didn’t have to come to this. But because I know what role I personally played in making Mother Nature adjust to me, I have chosen to swop roles. I will use this time to meditate, sit and sort through unsolved emotions, exercise, because now there is plenty time for it; find new recipes and even basic dishes I so badly wish I could get from a restaurant right now and make it myself because I am capable.
I will NOT plan my tomorrow. I will NOT sit and sulk. Most importantly, I will NOT lose another second of my precious time nor lose myself again.
What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail? How are you, really? When was the last time you did something for the first time? Why are you worth knowing? How do you treat people who can do nothing for you? I urge you to sit with the questions and think hard before answering them. Be honest with yourself. The answers may shock you.
Use your time. Use this time. Better yourself. Don’t plan. Adjust.
I would love to hear from you, especially the younger adults, on how you have dealt with the Lockdown?
What has been your biggest challenge?
I’m looking forward to your thoughts and comments.