It Wasn’t Me, it was…

Since the beginning of this century, I have become more and more aware of this blame culture. Everywhere I look or listen, I see countless scenarios of this, in all aspects of life. How did this come about? I notice all walks of people blaming others, blaming their situations, blaming experiences. What is going on in our society?


What is a Blame culture?

“A set of attitudes such as those within a particular business or organization, region / country that are characterized by an unwillingness to take risks or to accept responsibility for mistakes due to a fear of criticism or prosecution.”

To Blame, as a verb means:

“Feel or declare that (someone or something) is responsible for a fault or wrong.”

In doing that, feeling, or declaring blame, one will never take responsibility, and cannot improve. The blame culture is embedded in South African society since the very beginning, due to a variety of factors. Many of them carrying validity.  The predominant sentiment is that it is always someone else’s fault: be it race, creed, school, friends, family or region, etc… the list goes on. Authority, generally makes an easy target.

Sometimes, we have all the right to complain and feel hard done by, in many instances, however what does that do to better our situation that we find ourselves in? Does it serve us, or does it deter us? Is it useful? The simple answer – NO.

You see, the “Blame Culture” is toxic. Consider the quote below by Gillian Duce:

“You do not blame your shadow for the shape of your body: Just the same: Do not blame others for the shape of your experience.”

You define the shape of your experiences…

Here’s our challenge to you, play the Blame Game for 7 days.


Lesson: Playing The Blame Game

Initially, become aware of any situation where you assign blame. You will quickly notice and pick it up. Then, instead of blaming , give thought to what you can do to change the situation or experience. You’ll quickly start noticing how much more resourceful you become. At the end of the day, reflect on your experiences, and which situations stood out for you. You will notice that by the 2nd day already, you will cast less blame, and take more responsibility for your own actions and thoughts. You will noticeably feel lighter!


Anchoring Thought

For the first week, start with using this anchoring thought:

“On this day I shall not blame any person or event.”

Here’s how to play the Blame Game:

  • Become Aware of not blaming people / events / circumstances
  • Anchoring thought (constantly through the day) it creates massive Awareness
  • Take accountability & respond vs reacting
  • Set an example by confidently taking ownership on something that didn’t work
  • Focus on learning
  • If you have to blame, do so constructively


Once you’ve played the Blame Game fore a couple days, come back here and let us know your experience with it and how it’s helped—or join our Facebook Group and let us know there under the “Silence the Critic” Unit!

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5 Responses

  1. “You do not blame your shadow for the shape of your body: Just the same: Do not blame others for the shape of your experience.”
    Yoh-this quote feels like it has opened aspects of my mind i never knew existed

  2. Taking accountability and responsibiliy for both my bad and good decisions has made me a much stronger minded person. It has helped me to correct my mistakes and focus on how i can better myself to achieve a version of myself that I can be proud of.

  3. When you blame others, you’re just refusing to grow and take accountability for your part in the situation

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